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Archive for April, 2009

Friends,

I got a troubling text from a friend the other day. He wrote me a message saying he needed help dealing with the people. So I asked him: “whch pple?”

“Jst evryone,” he texted me back. Confused, I asked for more details, “why everyone?”

He replied, “please call back.” I hesitated, but remembering my obligations, I decided to call back—I mean I am supposed to be a friend, a counselor, a consultant, a doctor . . .

Here was his story–at least his side of it:

First, he apologized for sending me a “please call back.” He said he could not afford airtime to call me himself because of the downward spiral his life was now in . . .

He said that his problems started with rumors that there would be lay-offs at work. He said his first mistake was NOT sharing these rumors, which puzzled me because I believe that gossip or rumor mongering is bad. But he explained that he should have shared the rumors with his wife and family. Why? Friends, because the rumors quickly turned into grim reality . . .

He was retrenched. As a result, he couldn’t pay his mortgage. In a matter of weeks, he got a foreclosure notice, and so the spiral went on . . .

But he soon realized these were far from his biggest problems. First were feelings of blame. It took him days to disclose to his family that he had received the dreaded letter at work, so when the foreclosure notice came this week, his family was shocked. They hadn’t had a chance to absorb the news of his job loss.

Now he’s confronted with feelings of shame—he is so embarrassed, he can’t face the public. So when he came to me the other day, he needed help dealing with the people first: his family and the rest of us.

The whole world is in financial turmoil—not just the people on Wall Street. And while news of this drama was playing out on the news, my friend was busy watching sports on pay-per-view—now he’s another statistic. The truth is people often feel like they are different and somehow immune to the hard facts of the recession.

For anyone facing bankruptcy, foreclosure, or job loss, facing the people (both family and the community) can be the most difficult challenge. In situations like these, people feel embarrassed, overwhelmed, and unsure how to answer all the questions that inevitably come. But there are things you can do to overcome this challenge. Here are my suggestions.

1. Determine the REAL Problem

Firstly (ideally in the first few days), anyone facing a situation like this should engage in intellectualization to find out what his or her main problem really is. When my friend explained his problem, I immediately thought he was missing the point. What do you think?

2. Quantify the Problem

When I talked to my friend, I told him he should quantify his problem. One sure way to accomplish this is to look at how this crisis in his life measures on the Social Readjustment Rating Scale found in many psychology and stress books. On this scale, your crisis is given a score based on how much it would affect your life. This score is based on studies that were done around the world on people in similar situations and was shown to be a reliable and consistent way to measure human social crisis.

3. Determine Your Assets, and Use Them

The next step is to capitalize and build on your personality. I told my friend he could take a quick but detailed test available on www.personality100.com. This could help him recognize his strengths as a person, which he could use to fight any obstacles on his way to recovery.

4. Address Your Feelings

He should certainly practice repression; this should take care of his feelings of shame. This strategy allows you to be less clouded in your thinking so that rational thinking guides your decisions. Again, most psychology and well-written stress books should have a good explanation on how to employ this tactic.

5. Make a Plan

And last but not least, anyone facing job loss, bankruptcy, or foreclosure should resort to regression and craft short-term and long-term life goals. Making a plan, and taking action to execute it, will leave you feeling empowered with solutions, instead of trapped by complications.

Coping with Your Financial Stress

Financial problems may feel like the end of the world, but they really aren’t. If you find yourself in a problematic situation like my friend, you can use these five steps to overcome embarrassment and put your life on a new path to success! Feel free to visit our blog: http://conciseinteractiveseries.blogspot.com/

About the Author

Joe Theu, M.D., is the author of the book: 7 Proven Steps: How to Defeat Stress without Going through the Embarrassment of Counseling, which describes these strategies well. The book is available on www.amazon.com and other major bookstores. If you’d like more information about how to cope with stress and about all these psychology strategies, visit www.conciseinteractiveseries.com.

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Indiana, USA (6 April,2009) – As job loss, bankruptcy, and divorce skyrocket with the global recession, the people facing these troubling financial hardships are struggling to cope. The weight of these issues can be unbearable, and this stress affects both mental and physical health. Depression and suicide are on the rise, and more and more people are looking for ways just to get through the day.

The new book, 7 Proven Steps: How to Defeat Stress without Going through the Embarrassment of Counseling (ISBN-13: 978-1438941295), helps readers tackle major life crises, such as job loss, divorce, and bankruptcy, with a simple yet scientific practical approach. The author, international consultant Dr. Joe Theu, presents a system to help his readers work through a crisis in a day-by-day format from day 1 up to day 21 and beyond with interactive exercises and action plans that makes it useful as a daily companion.

“Thousands of people worldwide have lost their jobs due to this recession,” said Dr. Theu. “We hear the statistics every night on the news, but what many don’t see are the struggles that take place inside the homes of these people who are struggling financially. The strategies in my book are designed to help people cope with the everyday hardships that come with the financial burdens that are so commonplace in today’s struggling economy.”

Both employees who’ve lost their jobs and the employers who want to help them will find solace in the strategies outlined in 7 Proven Steps: How to Defeat Stress without Going through the Embarrassment of Counseling.

“Stress can feel like a complicated and overwhelming problem for many… Dr. Theu has put forward a concise plan with effective solutions that can pave way for real change both for the person as well as his or her circumstances.” Kimberly Mehta, LPC (USA).

Joe Theu is an international consultant and talk show guest, who answers questions from people with different challenging situations. He is the author of 7 Proven Steps: How to Defeat Stress without Going through the Embarrassment of Counseling, part of the Concise Interactive Series, and the forthcoming How to Profit from Your Illness. He also publishes the Stress Management Today newsletter. Joe Theu’s works on www.conciseinteractiveseries.com are inspired by his radio talk shows.

Joe Theu can be contacted for interviews by e-mail to drjoetheu@gmail.com , or with Skype id: drjoetheu. 7 Proven Steps: How to Defeat Stress without Going through the Embarrassment of Counseling can be purchased on www.amazon.com, www.authorhouse.com, and other major book stores.

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